Posts Tagged 'blonde'

So since I bleached my hair as far as it could stand (for now), price I’ve been making my own “toner” with leftover color dyes.

Believe me, grip getting rid of this color:


…was not entirely my idea. I’ve been working at a college (two, actually) for a year now and my hair had not been an issue until someone from higher up the scale suggested it wasn’t proper to one of my admins (ugh, admins!), who suggested I tone it down. I thought I would dye it SFX’s Blue Black, which is my “work” color, but decided to go opposite on the scale.
I know you agree, everyone does – telling me to change my hair color was a dick move.
Students and co-workers alike roll their eyes, because I’ve been quick to tell the reason.
I work at an institution that teaches courses in hair styling and beauty, professors are allowed to exploit their image, and there’s no item among the employee’s manual that states anything at all about color choice.
But sometimes you don’t want to be outed as the rebel.

I find it odd, that after years (15 now) of having blue or blue-ish hair, this is the first time in my life where I actually get rude NEGATIVE comments about my hair. (Also dickish, negative opinions about appearance are never welcome, specially from people you barely know…) And not that I didn’t get rude comments before, but they were mostly out of curiosity. Now, even hobos have come up to me to say “you looked better in blue.”

I’ve been curious about Manic Panic’s “Virgin Snow” for decades, but to this day, I haven’t tried it because I’ve always made my own powder-light hair dyes by diluting portions of color dyes with conditioner… which is actually good for your hair rather than damaging, as actual toner is (containing peroxide). Most pigment dyes are peroxide free and oil based. So no need to worry about that, the bleach does the damage for you.

I presume you girls who read my blog know all about hair dye, but just in case you’ve never thought of it, or haven’t dared, I say, do it.

So here’s the recipe.


  • As with my cooking and mostly everything I do, I do not work using precise measurements. 
  • Do a strand test before proceeding on larger portions of hair, just in case!
  • I am not a professional. Do this only if you’re ok with experimenting. Some dyes are more pigmented than others, and dyes take depending on how porous your hair texture  is. No specific outcome is guaranteed and modification might be necessary!

Now. The process:

You need:

  • An empty bottle (preferably one with marked measurements) or mixing bowl, if you trust your instincts.
  • A bottle of conditioner (your choice).
  • Purple dye, or a blue that is purple based, or a red that is purple based.


1. If your hair is blonde or lightened to a light yellow, you might want to use purple hues to counteract the yellow tones. (Painters: you know your tertiaries.) So grab a purple dye or mix your own. I added about one ounce of these three (not one once of each, but blobs mixed together amounting to about an ounce) into my mixing bottle.


2. Add three parts of what you poured in as dye of conditioner. I used the one below, it’s cheap and effective. I added approximately up to where it said “4 oz.”



3. After you’ve shampooed and treated with regular conditioner or special masks or whatever, apply the color conditioner ALL OVER YOUR HAIR (or where you want it to work) and leave in for 15 to 30 minutes with a shower cap over it. Applying heat works as an accelerator, but ain’t nobody got a salon heat helmet (unless you happen to have one).

The result is (and do consider, my hair still has green hues from the previous, endless blue dye jobs) is a grey-ish tone rather than a yellow one. It looks almost lilac on my lightest patches, and the yellower strands (where my hair used to be black) is a greenish-ash rather than an orange.



You’re welcome. 😛

This tutorial is sponsored in part (through inspiration) by Devannah and her many beauty tips and tutorials.

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For a long time I’ve been feeling an overwhelming exhaustion from… being.
It’s kind of embarrassing to talk about… considering it’s not a “real” dilemma.
On the other hand, contagion considering this “NON-BLOG” – where I try to be the least personal – has become a haven for venting, buy since it’s buried under all these frames.

Like you have to come in to a dark room with a door you usually ignore, dosage then crawl under the covers to read it.
That’s how I like to imagine it, anyway.

Well, this exhaustion… I like to set nearly impossible goals for myself, most of which I keep secret, because though I suppose I cope with failure, I like to avoid it at all costs.
I think the last time I felt hopeful about life was while I was still stumbling through my MA, not really sure of what I was doing (as usual), but I thought it would lead me somewhere.
Then I graduated, and hesitated to apply to grad schools for many reasons…

So here I am, and here I’ve been for a long time… with flickers of excitement inbetween, distractions and experiences, none of which I regret… probably because there’s no point in regret, only lessons to be learned.

I’ve mentioned how work really sucks the magic out of me. I’ve been working at the same place for a year now (a year!) and it’s starting to give me an existential itch… wanting to explode.

So I have this (not so crazy idea) that I’ll be carrying out this year.
I also made a decision that I’d been wanting to make for a long time that I haven’t told a soul. (And I’m still not telling. Don’t wonder, it’s not even that interesting, but it is a chosen path of Fate.)

I kind of hate how sometimes my posts become all about my hair… but this is another decision I made that I’d only thought about in terms of “what if.”
Destroying my hair with bleach.

It doesn’t even look like the photos above anymore, I’ve lightened it one more time and the residual colors are fading.
I still feel strange when I look in the mirror and see blonde hairs on my hairbrush…

Though a purely superficial act, it’s symbolic for me… creation in destruction, a sort of death that needed to take place in order to allow rebirth. Rebirth of an imaginary state of being I only assumed in darkness, that took over me when I felt unlike myself…

So this existential discomfort is lifting with the simplest thing… something I want to do.

I’m still drawing pen sketches for Where Everything Lost is Found. I wrote a bit about it at my books blog. My deadline is May. Let’s see if I can come through.


I’ve also been finding scraps in what little is left in my old house, which is to be sold soon. (Not going to talk about that.)

I don’t like the notion that, try as we might, we really are essentially the same person. This little bit below was in a tiny notebook, I never even used it, only transformed it and recycled the rhymes. But it made me go “bleh.” I was perhaps 16 when I wrote it. Not going to use it now, either, but this is precisely the person I’m trying to un-become.

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