Posts Tagged 'stars like fish'

Posting here always feels like a soliloquy… at least initially. One would think after so many years of writing entries about anything online I’d know how to introduce an update post, dermatologist but no. I think this has more to do with not knowing what my audience is, having this blog format NON-BLOG buried here under all these distractions and not really knowing who reads it, IF someone reads at all (besides the usual 2 or 3).

I try to imagine that strangers come here and read this… though the site’s tracker says most of you land in from facebook or tumblr. But in spite of the awkward beginnings, it’s a comfortable feeling.

I also try to keep it objective and impersonal… IF I ever succeed- I try.

I’m 28 now. It’s a tradition of mine to go over my progress since my last birthday, to feel both good and terrible about where my life is going. Hence, I feel both good and terrible. But birthdays are mostly about feeling good, so, like every year, I need to thank my friends and dearests for making birthdaymonth an awesome one. I have this fantasy of throwing a wild party for my birthday and it never happens. But that’s okay.

As much as I hate work, one of the perks of working somewhere nice is people you don’t expect to make a big deal out of your birthday. When I worked at the UPR a few years ago, my co-workers (who are still great friends) made me cry over chocolate birthday cake made from scratch. Last year I started working at Instituto de Banca and, having only worked there for a month, every group I taught sang me the happy birthday song. This year one of my groups made a little birthday party out of the class, and it was more fun than I expected.

 

Visual confirmation of the fun:

 

Earlier in October, SLF had a spot at Festival de la Palabra thanks to my friend Max Charriez. Visual confirmation of that:

And an extra. Walking around the MAPR with Yaya. Posing.

But back to SLF, the info is mostly updated on the facebook page, because fb makes everything easy, so if you haven’t, please:

https://www.facebook.com/StarsLikeFish

https://www.facebook.com/StarsLikeFish

https://www.facebook.com/StarsLikeFish

 And hey, Christmas is near… put it on your wishlist. Your amazon wishlist. Even if nobody buys it for you.

Anyway, SLF has its own website for which I’ve sketched out a much nicer layout, but I don’t have the time to update it. I barely have time  to update myself!

But do go “like” it on facebook? It makes me feel fuzzy. Seeing new likes and all. “Like” suggests that you actually LIKE it, maybe that’s why.

Where Everything Lost is Found is on hold until I’m not too exhausted from this tiredness I’ve been carrying around for a few months. I had to quit my second job because I was burning at both ends.

Returning to the subject of updating oneself, I got a haircut… a professional one (shock – I hadn’t let anyone cut my hair since I was 16 years old). A colleague (styling prof) helped me out. I wanted crazy, untamed mermaid hair, but it was getting out of hand… so now it’s a few inches shorter, but it bounces. Please don’t take into account that the “before” pic looks like crap (which I took before I even considered the haircut). I was at home and not wearing any makeup (or a shirt, actually), and I was at work in the “after” pic, so I obviously look more presentable (I hope).

Obviously, that last bit about my hair was forced because I’ve run out of safe topics.
October to November has been kind of whirlwind, in retrospect.
Stay tuned for dangerous topics.
No promises, though.
Also.
Plugging:

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SLF on the internets!

Though I still refuse to acknowledge Facebook as “internet.” It’s just one huge suburb of the internet where you can see into everybody’s windows whether you want to or not…

But please, erectile if you made it all the way here, viagra sale go like SLF on facebook. I’ll appreciate it bunches.

Also, I have my first presentation at the UPR, and I’m really excited about it.

Click it. Say you’re going. Even if you’re not.

Other news… I was in NY last week with Velvet and awesomeness went down. Luxurious hotel fun, Dead Can Dance, and good times with friends. Photos elsewhere, but just to keep this personalized (?), here’s a photo. More (maybe) later.

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It’s 1:11 am and I’m still up, search and so overwhelmed by everything I want to do on my last vacation night – so overwhelmed, side effects that I have achieved absolutely nothing.

I spent part of the night grading tests, generic because on Monday I go back to work again, and work was so easily forgotten this past week! Even though it wasn’t particularly vacation-y… I went to bed late, picked up abandoned books, spent time online doing not much (though I reconnected with a few abandoned friends) and spent real time with some of my best friends. Sometimes I don’t realize how much I miss my friends until I see them again… kind of like old habits. I didn’t realize just how unlike myself I’ve been feeling since I started this new, repetitive schedule of going to bed early – to wake up early – to come home and work.

I’ve heard it from several people, more than once, that you have to make time to do the things you love, and this is something I intend to do, because even though one never really loses oneself, you might forget yourself from time to time… the prospects of that terrify me, not to mention, sicken me in a subtle way that make me feel dulled, restrained and absolutely miserable (but only to a tolerable degree). Because I always, on the brink of the unmentionable, have little bouts of insanity, sometimes painful, that bring it all back.

And, on the subject of work (pouring my heart out here still seems like an intimate thing to do, since I know only a very few read me, though I’m about to promote a change in that), more than once I’ve heard myself labeled “teacher,” which bugs me. “Oh, no, no, no, I’m not a teacher!” Though I am, I am not. The term as defining seems so limiting and dull… no matter who says it (a student, for instance). But I mean it in the context in which I’ve heard it used (more than once), as if what my work at this moment defined me as a person.

I am so much more comfortable undefined, even when I can’t figure it out for myself: I don’t care to.

End of rant.

(It’s late. )

Now, switching to something completely different… are you on bloglovin?

Click it: Follow on Bloglovin

I remember Sophie telling me about this months ago, but I am slow to do anything suggested sometimes… Not sure to what extent I enjoy the privacy of anonymity I’ve enjoyed thus far, I guess we’ll see…

To break the monotony of letters, I made another gif of my face, this time with a wig (also making a statement about wigs, a mini-rant I included with a shot on facebook), enjoy (if you enjoy that type of thing).

And back on the subject of things I want to do, all at once, but ended up ranting here instead, I really love painting and got back into it because I was commissioned by my uncle to paint something for him (which I haven’t started because he owes me a reference pic). But I finished an owl painting I started about a year ago (and abandoned about a year ago), and everyone likes the outcome (including myself). Click for larger image. Or click here for devation.

I finally bought myself a camera… all I need now is to start taking pictures (something else I wanted to do tonight but didn’t bring myself to). Hopefully, I’ll be photobombing soon.

And something that deserves a fair mention (on the subject of picking up abandoned books that I didn’t continue reading tonight), my friend Miguel published a book which is, so far, possibly too good to ever become ridiculously popular. Click it and follow the White Rabbit.

Anyway, there will be a very interesting and interactive presentation on August the 23rd (announced with specifics here) and I was invited to be a reader! Along with Daniel Pommers (El Esqueleto Presenta). I think this is pretty rad and I’m excited.

Plugs related to this: Generación del Atardecer Presenta | Postdandyexpress | Cosmos Burlesco fb page | Gato Malo Editores | Le Papillon

 

Now it’s 2.

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I think this update will be more pleasant for us both if I sort it by topics. So here goes.

  • I made a gif of my face for giggles. Hi.

 

 

 My friend Krisia (which you should go LIKE on facebook) took some photos of me in April, prostate we had such an amazing day! (You can read all about it and see the photos over here, if you’d like, by the way). Anyway, she had an expo last month, and I was surprised to find that this piece was among them! She did other portraits of girls based on her own photos of them which were also there, and this awesome one of a kind art book:

Click the images to visit her website, I invite you to stalk her.

  • Now. About Stars Like Fish… a couple of things.

If you’re thinking about buying it, I recommend you buy it from me on Etsy. It will be signed, customized and I’ll include little extras. Maybe. But it’s cheaper than online bookstores and probably more fun.

On that subject, OH MY GOSH, my internet friend forever Teresa wrote such a heartwarming comment on my book… please, please go read it. I’m kind of afraid of what people have to say about it (though also insanely curious), but Tere knows me and what it’s all about, plus she’s an intelligent, creative (and pretty) girl of letters and whatnot, so you might understand why it means so much to me. I snatched an image of hers:

Also: the book has some errors. Some typos, some mix-ups. I almost DIED when I started discovering them, even after I had edited myself (literally) ad nauseam. I had nightmares for days that I re-read the book and it was all nonsense, that there were tons of typos on each page… blah. New files have been uploaded, so new online buyers will get the error-free version (or, the less-error version). However, those of you who have the typo’d version: feel free to proofread it with a brightly colored pen, I will not feel disrespected at all.

I suppose the problem was that: editing it myself. Next time, I will hire some friends to do it for me. Not sure how to repay them, though… if you’re up for it, let me know. (Half serious. Emphasizing serious.)

Also, I’ve been getting interesting and very positive feedback from friends. THANK YOU.

On some of them comments I’ve gotten, here’s the advice I give to everyone: READ THE STORIES IN ANY ORDER, like the middle, working your way randomly. It was not written in order, and it isn’t meant to have a chronological order. Rather, it’s circular, coiling into itself.

And, paraphrasing my BFF María, don’t read it from start to finish in one sitting.

But then again, if you have it in your hands, it’s your book, read it however you want.

I’m really motivated to finish the one in the works.

  • On the subject of reading, click this link! No. I tricked you, if you’re here, you probably don’t read more academical papers, but if you like poetry and understand Spanish (even though the comment is written in English, click it).

 

  • Site-related: I have a new affiliate! Krystal is totally cool and it makes me happy to see girls on the web who still keep domains and quality personal websites rather than just a pre-designed blog. I may be hunting for more… if you’d like to affiliate with me, please contact me via any method in this site! Shoutbox, comment, any of my social sites. Please!

 

  •  And finally, for those of you to whom this is relevant, keep an eye on my GothAuctions, CyberThrift or Auctions @ a-e  because I just did some closet cleaning and will probably be posting some Demonia shoes, Lip Service, Tripp NYC and other Hot Topic-key items because life and age are un-gothing my existence. Well, mostly my closet, never my spirit. I’m also selling off my Living Dead Dolls (not all of them)…

 

  • I suppose that’s pretty much it for now, internet.

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I may be doing this backwards, advice but I’m not one to follow rules (not all the time).

I am a creature of the web – though not entirely by choice – so I think it is fair the way this book came about, as an actual book.

As the subject suggests, Stars Like Fish is now available for purchase at amazon and CreateSpace.

There are plans for it, but for the time being, it is only available online (trade paper and Kindle versions).

If you’d like a copy – and I’m hoping so!- , use coupon code SM3AUVDT at checkout on CreateSpace and get 3$ off!

I keep getting the question but what is it about?

It’s an anthology of short stories and poems with photographs. It’s an extended dream, really. If I start to describe it, I’ll end up writing something like what you will find in the actual book or bore you with theory. So go look at the previews instead. 🙂

They appear when you click “LOOK INSIDE.” It’s not what the paper copy looks like, only the Kindle version.

If you buy it and read it, PLEASE leave reviews. And spread the word! If you’re on tumblr, I appreciate reblogs of this post! And facebook likes and shares, tweet it!

Today I’m going through old notebooks once again, and it’s such a unique feeling… I’m working on a second. Since I know the number of people who read up here are limited (hi, Sophie), I let you in on all the secrets.

It’s already in the works, and will be finished in a couple of months. It’s another collection, this one of more poetry than SLF, and some poetic prose and short stories. The working title is Where Everything Lost is Found. I have no previews of the cover art yet, because it has none! But in time.

But back to reading old work… it’s like having a conversation with a childhood friend about events you had forgotten all about. Like becoming someone you used to be.

I really need to get all this old work on paper so I can return to the future.

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So for a few months I’ve been working on something very secret of a secretive nature.

For years and years I’ve had material collecting in corners of my class notebooks, healing scrap paper, viagra journals and blogs, case and, long after I had placed the idea of publishing in the very back of my mind (filed under “projects”), I decided to put it all together to be printed as a “book.” Because that’s what writers do… I’ve spent the last decade taking in literature and pushing out academic papers, building up an inferiority complex and at the same time, finding my own place in pages. Mostly virtual pages.

The decision to publish came about when, out of curiosity, I ordered Hélène Cixous’ Dream I Tell You, (I encourage you to click that link) a beautiful collection of dreams.  After spending a year immersed in theory (language, psychoanalysis and sctructuralism) while writing my thesis (on Lacan and Lewis Carroll’s Alice books), I was inspired. Why not?

Most of what I write comes from forces I have no control over, and most of those are the patchwork universe of my dreams. Friends and readers have considered my transcribed dreams to be short stories, and I suppose some people may be turned off by the thought of reading dreams… but I think dreams are the raw material from which a creative text can come to be, as words. The rawest poetry, or poetry in its rawest form, both interchangeable. I’m satisfied.

I’m publishing it myself, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. It will be my first personal publication, and I rather have no opinions or critiques involved (please don’t misjudge). I had tried, very long ago, and the process was far from productive.

It will be available for purchase in possibly a few weeks, after final revisions. If you’re a follower and happen to buy it (or obtain a copy from me), you may recognize some characters or pieces that used to be on my livejournal.

But it’s not ready yet… in the meantime, a teaser of the cover:

 

Now, on an entirely different subject, Velvet got the mermaid I drew for her tattooed yesterday! I sat with her throughout the session, we looked at a Bettie Page book meanwhile. Fun, fun. It’s now on the back of her thigh, and she’ll be getting another when I draw her an angled octo-lady. The artist made the face slightly different, but overall, it looks rather awesome! And OMG, my drawing is on my best friend’s thigh. <3

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